Six Funny Life Lessons
Below are 6 very funny and true life lessons to be learned that I’ve received via email. Jokes aside, the insight gained is valuable to everyone and I somehow don’t think you’ll regret reading them. 
Lesson 1: Naked Wife
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob.
After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks,…
“Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies. “Great!” the husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”
Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
Lesson 2
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish” “Me first! Me first!” says the admin. clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Poof! She’s gone. “Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone. “OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.”
Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
Lesson 3
A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,”Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But,changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.”
Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.
Lesson 4
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him,”Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?” The crow answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up.
Lesson 5: Power of Charisma
A turkey was chatting with a bull “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, but I haven’t got the energy.” “Well, why don’t you nibble on my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it wont keep you there.
Lesson 6
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Moral of the story:
1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy
2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend
3. And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!
*EXTRA* Lesson 7: Popularity can be harmful (by Digg user outhouseinput 
)
A man decides to write a funny and informative collection of stories meant to drive home some interesting life lessons. While he was writing them, his wife came by and asked what he was doing. He explained to her that he wanted to send his friends something interesting to chat about at work the next day. His wife advised him to post it on an internet blog for fun. The husband took her advice, but negligently set up his own server without properly analyzing the potential for an instantaneous burst of Digg traffic. The site, therefore, went down in flames hosting a few paragraphs of text.
Moral of the story:
Don’t listen to your wife.
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April 17th, 2007 at 8:20 am
Haha.. that’s funny stuff AND informative too!!
April 17th, 2007 at 11:07 am
its good man!
April 17th, 2007 at 9:09 pm
[EN] 6 Grandes lecciones que hay que aprender en la vida…
6 fantásticas fábulas sobre la vida laboral. Hay alguna realmente graciosa….
April 17th, 2007 at 10:11 pm
I don’t speak spanish so i can’t leave a great comment like th guy above me
April 17th, 2007 at 11:22 pm
6 el fantastico por favor el catolonate en misa rompono pantalones si a primavera mui del locos
Thomas, if you don’t know spanish, just pretend
April 17th, 2007 at 11:49 pm
Eu não falo espanhol, mas falo português. Estas histórias, já eu as li em todas as línguas, mas gostei da útlima e mais recente história. É tão verdadeira…
April 17th, 2007 at 11:53 pm
Hahaa, very clever and informative. Nothing beats the first one though, very good.
April 17th, 2007 at 11:55 pm
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April 18th, 2007 at 12:26 am
4,5 and 6 are great and 3 is just funny
April 18th, 2007 at 12:31 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 12:33 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 12:44 am
I’d kill Bob.
The guy is nice enough to lend you money and you “rape” his wife like that. I know some people can take this very lightly, but I find it very disrespecting and defacing to the husband.
April 18th, 2007 at 12:48 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 12:50 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 12:56 am
u guys rock!!
i really enjoy it!! from the content to the comments.!!
April 18th, 2007 at 1:19 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 1:25 am
dude, how are some of those true, like the ones with the animals
April 18th, 2007 at 1:53 am
http://babelfish.altavista.digital.com/babelfish/tr
Learn it,
Know it,
Love it
April 18th, 2007 at 1:57 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 1:59 am
Ummm….What he said….
^
|
|
April 18th, 2007 at 2:04 am
A guy was stroking himself in a public bathroom stall. A cop came by and, instead of arresting him, decided to join in for some circle jerk action. Another cop came in, saw what was going on, and arrested both of them, humilating the man and the other cop and their families.
Moral of the story:
Some cops like dicks. Some cops are dicks.
April 18th, 2007 at 2:51 am
i like tacos……
hehehehe
thats spanish
or mexican
or whatever…
April 18th, 2007 at 2:58 am
If only Psalm 129 said what the joke says it says…. (It doesn’t.) Kindda kills the effect of the story’s moral.
April 18th, 2007 at 3:13 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 3:19 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 3:57 am
the guy speaking spanish said “6 lessons that you have to learn in life” and the other guy who can’t speak spanish but tried said “6 the fantastic please el (not spanish word) on my (not spanish word) pants if the spring very of crazys.” wonderful sentence…
April 18th, 2007 at 3:59 am
good stuff
April 18th, 2007 at 4:05 am
Love em all, will have ot try and remember them now so I can look witty at parties. Uh oh… is there a life lesson built into doing that which will result in me dying or something?
April 18th, 2007 at 4:44 am
Although most of the stories are common, your interpretation of the morals was simply hilarious. Real nice take on those stories… LOVED IT
April 18th, 2007 at 4:47 am
Great stories with good morals, I like it!
April 18th, 2007 at 4:50 am
You did not write these… perhaps collected them together.
April 18th, 2007 at 4:56 am
These are wise, wise, words, and the comedic touch drives the point home.
April 18th, 2007 at 5:20 am
MUY comico!!
April 18th, 2007 at 5:22 am
refreshing stuff, i like it very much
thx man . .. . . . .
April 18th, 2007 at 5:24 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 5:42 am
Very usefull collection.. if u really think about it.. its become usefull to you.. think you are the character of the story then realise all
April 18th, 2007 at 5:47 am
HUMOUR : Six Funny Life Lessons…
Below are 6 very funny and true life lessons to be learned that I’ve received via email. Jokes aside, the insight gained is valuable to everyone and I somehow don’t think you’ll regret reading them….
April 18th, 2007 at 5:56 am
[…] Hat tip […]
April 18th, 2007 at 6:06 am
Awesome tips dude. Lesson 4 and 3 are the best.
April 18th, 2007 at 6:14 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 6:22 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 6:52 am
that was a real gud one n funny, nice one dude
April 18th, 2007 at 7:31 am
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April 18th, 2007 at 7:48 am
yeah .. never listen 2 wife !!!
April 18th, 2007 at 7:57 am
ParentDish Size 6: Life Lessons…
Filed under: Size Six , Family togetherness , Moms , Dads I ran across a blog post today entitled "Six…
April 18th, 2007 at 8:39 am
This is how my weeks have gone recently (the covered in dung part).
I loved them all. I emailed the $800 naked deal to my work email already to share tomorrow.
April 18th, 2007 at 8:43 am
It is nice, enjoyable and useful
April 18th, 2007 at 9:16 am
cool dude!
April 18th, 2007 at 9:26 am
[…] Six Funny Life Lessons: Six life lessons told in fable form: A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. […]
April 18th, 2007 at 9:50 am
Fuckin’ A!! Very good man!
April 18th, 2007 at 9:52 am
story #1 for the win! haha!
April 18th, 2007 at 10:10 am
Yes, great stories, I had some nice laugh reading them and the messages are great too!! :))
April 18th, 2007 at 10:11 am
Very funny and informative
especially the last one lol
April 18th, 2007 at 1:44 pm
That’s just plain awesome.
April 18th, 2007 at 2:50 pm
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April 18th, 2007 at 3:08 pm
Too true! Lesson 2 was hilarious!
April 18th, 2007 at 3:35 pm
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April 18th, 2007 at 4:56 pm
[…] Read All Lessons […]
April 18th, 2007 at 5:15 pm
It’s funny cuz its true.
April 18th, 2007 at 5:19 pm
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April 18th, 2007 at 5:30 pm
hahaha.. lesson #7 so good!
April 18th, 2007 at 7:48 pm
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April 18th, 2007 at 8:05 pm
Funny post, thanks for sharing. You deserve all the traffic you get.
April 18th, 2007 at 9:41 pm
Haha. Great!
April 18th, 2007 at 9:44 pm
Great life lessons. Will need to have my wife read them as well!
April 18th, 2007 at 10:02 pm
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April 18th, 2007 at 10:45 pm
Not All Mass Email is Bad Mass Email:…
6 funny and true life lessons received via email. (Carl Pei)……
April 19th, 2007 at 12:16 am
You depressed cubicle monkeys really go for this kind of crap, don’t you?
April 19th, 2007 at 1:25 am
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April 19th, 2007 at 2:31 am
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April 19th, 2007 at 3:38 am
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April 19th, 2007 at 7:17 am
[…] Six Funny Life Lessons | Who the hell is Carl Pei? Moral of the story: 1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy 2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend 3. And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut! (tags: humor funny life advice lessons) […]
April 19th, 2007 at 2:46 pm
these 6 life lessons are just great….!!
have u written some similar great things ??
April 19th, 2007 at 3:05 pm
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April 19th, 2007 at 5:02 pm
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April 22nd, 2007 at 5:10 am
lol very funny, spotted this on digg
April 22nd, 2007 at 7:09 am
[…] Six Life Lessons from Chain Email Stories The same strange stories you can sometimes find in your inbox, but with actually quite practical […]
April 24th, 2007 at 2:12 pm
moral are so wicked .. love ‘em !!!
3 was the best !!!
April 28th, 2007 at 1:52 am
The first 6 were great!
April 30th, 2007 at 5:25 am
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May 1st, 2007 at 7:17 pm
loved them! moral 6 was the best
Libby
May 23rd, 2007 at 11:50 pm
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May 24th, 2007 at 10:34 am
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May 25th, 2007 at 3:26 am
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June 4th, 2007 at 2:31 pm
The First Great Lesson of My Life…
The First Great Lesson of My Life…
August 4th, 2007 at 3:49 pm
[…] Lying may get you far, but won’t keep you there. Soon enough you will be undermined by your own lies and spend more time worrying about covering them up than actually improving your business. If you need a funny anecdote, check out lesson 5 from my classic post; Six Funny Life Lessons. […]